Destroyed by text. Pt. 02

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Wednesday evening:

John 10:05pm: ‘Hi Pam. What was it like obeying you the other night? Well, first off, it was a total shift of perspective. I mean we’d known each other for years; you as my boss and me as the underling, but I’d never dreamt there would be a sexual dynamic to our relationship. When you told me that you had your hand inside your panties, imagining your bare, pale thighs and panties as you pleasured yourself was really exciting.

The actual evening was a really mixed bag. I have to admit travelling out of my way to get to your office after a hard day at work only to find you’d gone home really annoyed me. I was cold, hungry and pissed off at you. Then when you made me wait even longer, I was simply fuming. I only did so because I so desperately needed the expenses money. By that point I was feeling really resentful, impatient and powerless.

That was when you turned it all on its head by telling me my suffering gave you pleasure and you were texting one handed with your other hand inside your panties. I imagined you relaxing all cosy in your home after a lovely dinner with your husband, idly stroking yourself in the lap of luxury while you had me hungry, cold and wasting my time just for your amusement.

For some reason knowing you were cosy, relaxed, warm and sensually pleasuring yourself made my own suffering exciting; as though the more I suffered and the more you enjoyed seeing me suffer, the more I actually liked it; not the actual suffering (stripping naked in the cold night air was truly horrible) but the juxtaposition of me debasing myself while you insulted, mocked and controlled me in your lap of luxury was such an exhilarating feeling; thank-you so much, Pam.

Part of that exhilaration was a sense of being overwhelmed by how sudden it all was; how you were able to shift the dynamics of our relationship so quickly. It was, and still is, terrifying to me to think that in one evening, and just with a few texts, you had me waste my whole evening shivering in the cold and even cover myself with dog excrement. But within that terror I have such a sense of awe for your ability to control me beyond what I even know I am capable of. I still can’t really believe you could make me willingly roll in dog excrement and yet I did; and sent you the proof.

It is really confusing; obviously rolling in dog excrement was disgusting beyond belief; I wretched and vomited until I got home and could shower the disgusting filth from my body and yet the idea that I debased myself for you in that way is a thrill that far outlasts the physical discomfort. It is a delicious torture to suffer for your amusement, Pam, and I am both terrified and excited by what you might demand Ümraniye Fetiş Escort of me next.

I fear I may need psychological help! I hope this report is okay.’

Pam 11:15pm: ‘LMAO! First off: £100 fine for daring to be pissed off at me for making you wait, arse-hat. Second: £100 fine for imagining me touching myself, creep-a-vert. Thirdly £100 fine for describing serving me as a waste of your evening; serving me is your purpose, dillster. Fourthly; Set up a direct debit £200 a month for the privilege of serving me as you obviously enjoy it so much! Oh; and you’ll be beyond psychological help; I’ll see to that, shitwit!’

John 11:20pm: ‘But Pam, you know I’ve only got £150 and you’re taking that from me tomorrow!! I don’t even know how I’m going to survive!’

Pam 11:35pm: ‘What’s your overdraft facility?’

John 11:36pm: ‘£500’

Pam 11:38pm: ‘Yay! Then you can pay your fines and your first direct debit tomorrow by maxing out your overdraft. Now get my second report done while me and hubby make love before we go to sleep. Happy typing twat face!’

John 12:23am: ‘Here’s my second report, Pam: How do I feel about you emptying my account tomorrow? Well, first off, I’m truly scared of the consequences of literally having no money for two weeks. I mean, when you first told me to give you the last of my money it was such a thrill, but at the same time I knew I could survive on my overdraft, but now you’ve raped that too. It’s the same addictive feeling that made me willingly roll in dog excrement for you; the more real and dangerous it is, the more exhilarating the feeling it creates in me. Giving you my money and maxing out my overdraft really leaves me with nothing and I’m terrified of how I’ll cope and yet at the same time I love that you’re taking my money; I love that you’ll have excess money to enjoy spending on frivolous items while I probably will have to borrow, beg and steal just to get by. The idea of me being denied the basic essentials while you spend that same money on frivolous products gives me such a thrill. Oh, Pam; I’m terrified of this addictive feeling of being destroyed by you, and of the fear you will happily do so. I’ve set up your direct debit already (thank you for sending me your bank details) and I am really looking forward to seeing you, even if only briefly, to drain my account and hand you my money.’


Pam 8:05am: ‘ATM Morrisons. 8:45am.’

John 8:06am: ‘On my way, Pam.’

John 9:45am: ‘Thank you so much for meeting me to drain my account. You somehow look even more beautiful taking my money. Seeing your manicured fingers snatch the money from my hand was so arousing, as was the flutter Ümraniye Gecelik Escort of panic as I saw my account go into minus figures. I loved that you wore your pink V-neck sweater as it meant I could glimpse your magnificent cleavage with your silver heart pendant dangling between your beautiful breasts. Adoring your sensual charms, knowing they are off-limits to me, instils in me almost a sense of worship. The fact you were late, making me wait again, was equally thrilling and I realize now that my suffering for you is what I am born to do; what I need and crave so badly! Every moment in your presence is a privilege and the way you just strutted up to me, snatched the money and left helped me understand your superiority to me, and that the slightest chance to be in your presence is a privilege. Thank you, Pam.’

Pam 11:06am: ‘Do not compliment me; you only please me with money and destroying yourself. You stared at my cleavage; Urgh! £300 fine! Emptying your account is only the start of your obsession to please me, shit-bag! I’m gonna send you some daily affirmations you’re to say out loud every fucking morning!’

John 11:07am: ‘Yes, Pam.’

Pam 12:15pm: ‘Here’s your affirmations, twatling. Anything you disagree with, let me know… if you dare! LOL:

‘My purpose in life is to be used by Pam.

Pam being happy/carefree and me being miserable/worried are how things should be.

From now on I am no longer a man. My true purpose is Pam’s happiness & amusement.

Paying Pam is a beautiful and tangible way of showing my adoration

Degrading myself for Pam’s amusement is a beautiful and tangible way of showing my adoration

Everything I give to Pam is a gift to myself.

I am worthless except when I serve Pam.

My total destruction by Pam is my aim in life.

John 12:20pm: ‘Thank you so much, Pam. These are amazing and do you such justice. I will say them out loud every morning. Could I please have a photograph of you to worship while I do?’

Pam 1:01pm: ‘Sure; £500 for a photograph. But the idea of you touching your hamster dick as you look at your goddess makes me wanna puke… So… You’re gonna have to agree to being in chastity! LOL! Just see it as another chance to suffer for Goddess and feel that exhilaration you crave so much! LOL! In fact, beg me to put you in chastity!’

John 1:05pm: ‘Please, Goddess Pam; please put me in chastity I beg you.’

Pam 1:50pm: ‘I want you to agree that no woman should have to ever be touched by you; that anyone who ever loved you was wrong; that trying to remove your chastity belt is an affront to your Goddess & that you swear to remain single & serve only me!’

John Ümraniye Genç Escort 1:55pm: ‘I swear it, Goddess Pam.’

Pam 2:30pm: ‘LMAO! You’re such a creep-a-vert!’

John 2:40pm: ‘I’m whatever you want me to be, Goddess Pam.’

Pam 4:45pm: ‘I’m doing the rotas. They’re much easier if I just allocate every spare shift to you. it means you never get a day off, and some days you’ve got double-shifts, well most days actually LOL, but that’s okay isn’t it; because then you can work away to give even more money to your Godess; Anything and everything for Goddess, right? You will struggle and work all day every day…so that you can give me more! more! and always MORE! Isn’t that right, shrimp crank?’

John 4:52pm: ‘If I can make doing the rota’s easier for you then I’m pleased, Goddess. I’m dreading working all the time, but the thought of you relaxing and enjoying yourself while I work myself to exhaustion for you feels such a privilege and gives me the feeling I crave and that I can only experience serving you. Thank you for letting me work extra shifts for you, Goddess Pam.’

Pam 4;49pm: ‘Okay then, well fuck-off and don’t bother me unless I text you. In fact; you’re banned from the office & if you see me in the street, cross the fucking road! Being in my presence is something you’ll have to earn, freak-a-zoid.’

Thursday evening:

Pam 10:00pm: ‘Here’s some principles for you to live by, dickwad. Enjoy! LOL:

1: Less is more: By denying you everything you want, you will appreciate the scraps I throw you even more; just like how when I snatched your money and walked off gave you a ‘moment’ that if I’d been able to stomach your presence, would have been lessened. In other words, appreciate your scraps you undeserving turd!

2: More is less: The more you give me and the more I take, the less it means because it becomes the norm and so doesn’t please me anymore. So, you’re £200 a month direct debit doesn’t impress me once it’s set up; I take it for granted, so you’ll have to do more and more to please me & get my attention.

3: Less is less: Everything I take from you and take for granted I expect to be kept going! Any drop in payments or servitude is going below what is acceptable. Never disappoint Goddess by offering less; always more, more, more… and MORE! LOL!

4: More is more: The more you sacrifice and give to me, the more I’m happy and the more you fulfil your purpose. Win:win! Yay!

So, don’t fucking forget, dumb shit; less is more, more is less, less is less and more is more! Hahaha!’

John 10:15pm: ‘Thank you Goddess Pam. I will try to live by your guidance.’

Pam 11:00pm: ‘Start getting credit cards. I want to begin bankrupting you! LOL! Don’t worry, I’m gonna enjoy taking my time destroying you, but you do need the means to pay for this chastity belt I’ve chosen for you! it’s extra small of course! LOL. Say ‘thank you, Goddess.’

John 11:01pm: Thank you, Goddess.’

Pam: ‘Fuck off you pathetic loser!’

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