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This is my first story to be posted in several years and I hope you all enjoy it as much as I have. More chapters will be added if readers seem to enjoy the characters and story line. I have my fingers crossed!
Please feel free to vote, comment, and send feedback. All are greatly appreciated!
*All characters portrayed are of legal age and do not represent any one particular person.*
The tissue box is empty and my heart is in a million pieces. I sound like a cliché, don’t I? At least there aren’t pints of ice cream in my system. Oh great, that’s the only thing I have going for me – I didn’t binge on ice cream. Way to go, Ashley. The relationship I thought was the one and only of my life is over and it ended messy. He cheated and I caught him red-handed or as my friend Cara likes to put it, dick in a whore. She’s right of course but I haven’t made it to my anger phase yet. I’m still firmly planted in broken and sad land. The worst part is I don’t know how to get out.
It’s only been three days since I caught Brent in bed with a girl he had just met and I’m still kind of amazed that life is supposed to keep going. I went from being in what I thought was a happy relationship living with the man I loved to living alone and being alone. Cara would kill me if she knew I was wallowing like this since she believes I should just set his stuff on fire and go get laid. If I’m totally honest a part of me screams hell yes at that idea but I’m still pulling myself up from the pile this breakup has left me in. I should probably just listen to Cara though. It sounds better than sitting in on the couch in sweats watching movies and crying even when they’re funny. So yeah, here I am being a blubbering mess waiting for something to happen. I don’t know what that is yet but I just feel like I’m in limbo. What am I supposed to do now?
There’s a loud banging noise. It’s annoying. I roll over and pull the blanket over my head. The banging starts again and I realize it’s not a dream but someone at my door. When did I fall asleep? I roll off the couch and make my way to the entry way dragging my blanket behind me. I can hear Cara cursing on the other side of the door before I even reach for the knob and find her looking highly annoyed when it’s open. She quickly looks me up and down before shaking her head and pushing past me. I don’t even bother glancing in the mirror next to the door before following her into the kitchen. She’s glaring at me as soon I as I walk in and I brace myself for the whirlwind that is my friend.
“So, is hobo chic the look you’re going for or did your shower break and you forgot how to use the sink?” Ouch! I don’t even try to answer that and plop onto one of my barstools and lean my head on my hand. I feel defeated and I’m pretty sure that’s exactly how I look. Cara sighs. “Ok. I know how hard this is. Troy cheated on me after three years together, remember? I get it! But you can’t let it beat you down like this. It’s pathetic and I love you too much to let you. So, what are you going to do about it?” She’s looking at me expectantly as if I should already have a master plan. I blink at her a few times before shrugging and laying my head on the counter. When did I become this person? I’m not normally like this. A brief thought pops in my head that this might be what depression is but it’s fleeting and I’m soon distracted by Cara yanking my blanket off me and pulling me out of the kitchen.
I’m being dragged down the hallway listening to Cara mumble to herself that she has to do everything and that I’m a hot mess straight into the bathroom. She quickly flips the shower on and then turns on me with a determined look in her eye. I do nothing but stand there. “Ashley! Wake the hell up! If you can’t do this yourself then I’m doing it for you. You’re going to get your ass in this shower right now and when you’re done all this moping around is over. Do you hear me? Over!” She’s fuming. I take a deep breath but I don’t understand what she expects me to do. How does a shower fix this? Sounds like a lot of pressure for a bottle of soap and hot water. I realize I haven’t spoken once since she got here and finally find my voice. “I don’t think a shower makes everything all better, Cara.” She glares at me again and then rolls her eyes. I catch my reflection in the mirror and wince. So maybe a shower can fix at least one thing.
Just when I think Cara is heading out of the bathroom she whirls back around. We stare at each other for a moment. Finally she says, “I want you to get it all out in that shower. Cry, scream and swear if you have to. Hit the walls if it makes you feel better but get it all out in there. You have to release it and then move forward. You’ll be fine, babe. I won’t let you be anything else and you know that. Brent is an ass and you deserve better, so you fall apart in that shower but then you put yourself back together. I better see my friend out here clean and ready to live again because I will drag you kicking and screaming escort bayan otherwise.” With that she closed the door and I felt myself smile a little at my determined and loyal friend.
I did exactly what she said. I cried and cried in that shower. I sat on the floor and sobbed. I threw a shampoo bottle against the wall. I screamed and cursed his name. At some point I realized the tears had stopped and I felt a bit of the tension release. I washed and enjoyed the warmness. I even shaved my legs which were in dire need of a razor. By the time I turned the shower off I felt a bit more like myself. Did the shower make everything all better? No of course not. It did help something though. Feeling clean has a way of feeling like a new start even if it’s just the start of a new day. I pampered myself a bit. I lathered on lotion, I braided my hair, and made myself put on a pretty bra and matching underwear. It wasn’t necessary but I took Cara’s words to heart and decided I needed a boost of confidence even if it’s a minor one.
As I wandered back out into the living room I was surprised at what she had accomplished while I showered. Trash was picked up and the blinds were open. The sink was empty of dirty dishes and I could hear the dishwasher running. I think she even sprayed air freshener or maybe lit a candle. Maybe I let housework fall by the wayside a little. Ok, fine it was a total mess in here. I should probably feel embarrassed by that and the fact that my friend just cleaned up after me like I was a child but I don’t. I just feel grateful. “There she is!” Cara is sitting at my dining table with two mugs of steaming coffee wearing a grin. I sit opposite her and sip my coffee trying to pretend like I don’t know what she’s waiting for. She knows she was right and she wants me to admit it. I give in. “You were right. I know that’s what you want to hear but I mean it. I needed that. I needed my ass kicked into gear and I really needed that shower.” I give her a real smile and she seems to release a breath I didn’t know she was holding. “Well, I hope you shampooed twice.” She gave a wink with that little barb and I can’t help but smile again. “Good then! You’re smiling again, you look like you’ve come back to life and I feel like a fairy godmother.” Oh how I love her.
We spent a while chatting at that table and drinking coffee. We didn’t talk about Brent or the whore but just talking felt good. She caught me up on some gossip and talked me into going out the next night with her and some of her work friends. She finally wound our conversation back to more serious topics and asked if I managed to work at all while I’ve been holed up in here. I haven’t and internally flinch at the amount of work that has probably piled up. I work from home running my own business of selling sex toys. I do quite well but I can only imagine the amount of backlogged emails, phone calls, and orders waiting for me in the other room. Cara offers to help sort through what needs to be done and we lose several hours in my home office returning calls and emails and talking with my distributor to make sure orders are filled and shipped. We manage a pretty big dent in the mess I made before Cara needs to leave for a drink meeting with a client. She’s in public relations so late night meetings are the norm for her. I don’t know what I would have done without her. I give her a big hug and thank her again before she leaves. As she heads down the hallway from my apartment she tosses a lighthearted warning over her shoulder that I better be ready for some fun tomorrow night because she will accept nothing less.
The next day I’m better. I get several hours of work in and even started up a new ad campaign as well as secured myself a booth spot at an upcoming sex toy show. I did laundry and ordered some new clothes online as an additional pick me up. I feel pretty good. I realize I’m simply pushing aside the pain and memories of my failed relationship but at the moment it feels like what I need to do. I don’t want Brent back for anything and everything that belonged to him is already gone so I just keep trying to find happiness even in small things like clothes, delicious coffee, and good music. My phone dings a little bit after lunch with a text from Cara, *don’t forget about tonight! Dress hottttt!!* Hmm. A night out dancing and drinking will be fun but I hope she’s not expecting me to hook up with anyone. I’m not there yet. But, if I don’t dress up she won’t let me leave here until I do so I head to my closet to surrender to the dress code demand.
Hours later I’m freshly showered and shaved. My hair and makeup are done and I’m in a good mood. I’m still not dressed but have narrowed down my choices to two options. Laid out on my bed are a fitted black mini dress and tight jeans with a red crop top. For a brief second I want to just wrap up in a fluffy robe and sweatpants but finally decide on the dress and killer heels. My feet will hurt later but I love how my legs look in this dress and it will be fun to feel sexy for the night. I still refuse to hook up with anyone izmit eve gelen escort but some flirting won’t hurt and feeling wanted will go a long way right now. Cara finally arrives looking amazing in a pink bandage dress and approving of my dress choice as well. If anything she looks surprised and a bit relieved. I give her a questioning look but she ignores it. We’re quickly outside and in a cab heading to a club to meet up with the other girls. I actually start getting excited the closer we get and realize how much I need this. Once again Cara is right and I wonder if she will ever let me forget it. Probably not.
The club is busy and there seems to be an endless line at the door. One perk of clubbing with Cara is you never have to wait in line. Everyone knows her and catering to her means good press for them. It’s a win-win for everyone except the annoyed people glaring at us from behind the rope. The girls give evil eyes while the guys ogle and try to get our attention hoping to piggyback their way in. It never works. Cara introduces me to her friends from work at the door and the four of us head in to the booming club ready for some fun. Drinks are up first and they’re complimentary as well. I start with a top-shelf cosmo and it goes down oh so smooth. This really was a good idea. There’s such a mix of people in this club and it just oozes sex. Hell, people are practically fucking on the dance floor. I’ve never been to this particular club before but I can tell that everyone here is looking for one thing -hot sex. I try to steel my resolve of not hooking up and think I may be the only one here with that goal. I’m questioning my choice of dress when Cara and her friend Jen grab my hand and we move through the crowd following Amanda straight into the center of the dancing mob. I shake off my doubts and let myself get taken away by the music. That’s why we’re here right?
Song after song the four of us dance together and I find myself getting pretty close to Jen. I’m not usually one for over the top girl-on-girl dancing but I just go with it when she pulls me in. I see Cara laugh at us but she’s quickly distracted by a guy rubbing up against her. It’s not long before I feel a set of large hands on my hips and a body against my back. Jen continues to dance in front of me and I allow this random guy to join in the fun. I tried looking over my shoulder to see his face but with the darkness and pulsing lights I couldn’t see anything other than he was tall. Oh screw it! It’s just dancing and if he knows how to move than who cares what his face looks like. We continue dancing and I completely forget about Jen and start to really move with this guy. Our hips find a rhythm and his hands start to wander away from my hips. First they move around to palm my stomach and pull me even closer. I grind against him more in time with the music and I can feel him growing beneath his pants. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy that it was because of me and I felt myself grin.
I look up to find Cara and the girls as the mystery man behind me continues to move his hands upward but they’re all gone except Jen. She’s dancing with some guy but he seems more into it than she does. We catch each other’s eye and she gives me a smile and wiggles in the guy’s hands. My mystery man has become pretty brave all the sudden and one hand has boldly cupped my breast. I’m surprised to find myself getting a little aroused as he gently squeezes but then a pang of guilt hits just as quickly. Guilt! Guilt for what? I haven’t done a damn thing wrong and deserve to have fun. I tilt my head back against his shoulder and continue to move against him. This isn’t like me at all but I’ve decided not to care. I thought I only wanted to dance and drink but I realize I want to feel wanted. I want to feel sexy and I want to have fun. So screw being prim and proper and I push my breasts into his hands and wrap one of my arms up behind his head. All the while Jen is watching me and watching the hands of this hard stranger behind me. One thing I haven’t decided is what I like more, this guy’s hands on me or being watched so intently.
I turn around in his arms to finally see his face and freeze as soon as I look up. Justin! No! He grins at me and I bubble over in anger and slap him across the face. Why did it have to be him of all people? I see his shock and confusion as I push him away and head straight for the ladies room. I’m reeling in embarrassment and anger. I’m mad at him but even more at myself. I can’t believe I was rubbing up against the one guy I would have paid money never to see again. The guy who is my only one night stand from two years ago that was by far the worst sex I’ve ever had. The idiot promptly farted and fell asleep as soon as we finished. He even still had the condom on as he passed out. Disgusting! I knock some drunken girl out of the way and basically steal the bathroom right out from under her. I can hear girls yelling as I pass and a couple of them bang on the door since I have completely skipped the line and izmit otele gelen escort locked them out.
Suddenly one of the doors to a stall swings open and a girl stumbles out and barely even notices that I’m there. She completely bypasses the sink and heads right for the door. The fact that it’s locked is beyond her comprehension and I literally unlock it and push her out. Just before I shut the door Jen appears and I let her in. Girls are still lined up outside and some try to push the door open but Jen tells them to fuck off before slamming it shut and locking it once again. There will probably be a riot out there soon. Jen has made her way over to the mirrors and is fixing her hair and I wonder why she even wanted to come in here. Looking around it’s not like it’s a nice place. It’s badly lit, there are random pieces of toilet paper on the floor, and stains all over that I don’t even want to think about. I turn back to Jen and blurt out, “So this night really fucking sucks!” She turns around and gives me a small smile, shrugs and says, “I’m pretty sure it’s worse for that guy you bitch slapped.” I snort. He’s lucky I didn’t knee him in the balls. Suddenly Jen laughs and I realize I said that out loud instead of in my head. What a night.
Before I know it I’m spilling everything to Jen and she listens intently. I tell her all about Brent cheating and catching him with that whore’s legs wrapped around his neck. “He never did that with me! Do you know how much I would have loved to be really fucked like that? But no! We did hum drum boring sex always in the same position and you know what? It sucked! I admit it! It sucked and I faked my orgasms on a regular basis. I should have screamed that at him when I kicked him out, see how he liked that. Bastard.” I’m rambling but Jen keeps listening and I don’t seem to have an off switch. I continue, “Just when I decide to let go and have some fun it blows up in my face! That guy I was dancing with was my worst nightmare come back to haunt me.” She looks at me expectantly so I keep going, “I’ve been with that guy before. His name is Justin and he should come with a warning label – worst sex ever! But you know what? That’s not even the worst part. The worst part is I haven’t had an orgasm in over a month!”
I slump against the counter and look up at Jen to find her gaping at me. “It’s been over a month?” She whispered that question in horror and I sadly agree it’s true. She seems to be thinking and then shakes her head no and says, “I don’t get it. I know you said you faked it with your ex but that’s what vibrators are for sweetie!” I laugh because she’s right and obviously I have no shortage of those around with the business but I haven’t used them. It’s not what I wanted and I say so. I didn’t want a battery and a quick buzz. I wanted something real. I shrug again and go for a change of subject and ask her what happened to the guy she was with. She smiles at me again and simply says, “He wasn’t the one I was interested in. I was just passing time.” So I was right, she wasn’t into him. I wonder why she doesn’t just go after the guy she does want. She looks fantastic in her tight jeans and top. Any guy in here would be all over her given the opportunity. After quite a pause she finishes with, “I’m not sure the person I want is interested.” Huh. I guess everyone has insecure days. I tell her she should just go for it and that she doesn’t need to be hiding out in a bathroom with me.
I realize the women outside are pounding on the door again or maybe they never stopped. I just sigh and start to walk towards it to leave when Jen grabs my hand and pulls me back. I’m completely caught off guard and wobble a bit on my heels but she quickly pushes me against the wall by the sink and says, “They can wait.” After the slightest pause she kisses me. It’s soft at first and I can tell she’s waiting for me to respond. Part of me wants to push her away because, well I don’t know why, because it feels so fantastic. I kiss her back without even consciously deciding to. I’m not drunk but maybe she is. I don’t know what this is and we’ll both probably completely regret this later but wow, she can kiss. Her hands move to my head and hold me to her mouth and I find my hands on her hips pulling her in closer.
Abruptly Jen pulls away and looks at me. Our hands haven’t moved and I think we’re both waiting for the other to speak first. I hear my voice say, “I didn’t know you were…gay.” She keeps the straightest face and says she didn’t know I was either. Hmm. Touché. I feel her hands start to let go of my face and the intense need inside me to still be connected to her takes over and I pull her to me and kiss her. Her mouth tastes so sweet and it seems like I can feel every stroke of her tongue all over my body. I haven’t been kissed like this is a long time. Maybe never! One of Jen’s hands slowly slides down the side of my neck to the skin just below my throat. Her touch tingles all over and I yearn for more. Her hand continues down my chest and skims over the top of my breasts just above the edge of my dress. My skin prickles at the contact. Her fingers continue their back and forth path and one dips below the top of my dress between my breasts. I actually give a very quiet moan and I can feel her smile against my mouth. Oh this is good. Simple yet so good.
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